My fellow fermentery friends, I come to you today with a heavy heart and a glass that feels a bit too empty. A new Gallup poll has just dropped a bombshell on our little corner of the world, and it’s not a juicy triple IPA. This thing, a cold, hard stab to the back of every brewer, bartender, and beer-loving blogger, confirms what we’ve been whispering in the dark corners of taprooms: a shocking number of Americans have decided they are, in fact, “good” and don’t need a cold one after a long day.
According to this new data, the percentage of U.S. adults who report drinking alcohol has hit an all-time low. I’m talking a measly 54% of Americans now claim they drink. This is a dramatic slide from the golden era of 2023 when a respectable 62% of us were at least trying. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: “trying” is half the battle. This decline, particularly among women and Republicans, is frankly unforgivable. Who are these people? Are they replacing us with kombucha and CrossFit?
But wait, there’s more. The poll also reveals a disturbing trend: more than half of Americans now believe that moderate drinking is “bad” for one’s health. I guess they’ve forgotten about the cardiovascular benefits of a good red wine or the “social lubricant” properties of a crisp pilsner. What happened to our collective wisdom? Did a kale smoothie get spilled on our common sense?
Worst of all, those of us who still drink are drinking less. The average number of weekly drinks has plummeted to a measly 2.8. A glorious six-pack of craft beer now takes two weeks to get through? The horror! My friends, we are in a crisis. Our future isn’t measured in delicious, hazy IPAs, but in sad, lonely sips.
So what’s the solution? I say we fight back. We must champion the cause of moderate, responsible, and frankly, fun drinking. We have to remind the world that a well-crafted beer is a culinary masterpiece, not a health hazard. Let’s raise a glass (responsibly, of course) and toast to the good old days, and hope our fellow Americans come to their senses, one pint at a time. The fate of craft breweries everywhere depends on it.
